I know what it’s like to walk through the entire day (and dreams at night) in a state of depression. Not the “oh woe is me, things aren’t going my way” or “my heart is broken” depression. But clinical depression that won’t go away.
Sometimes I give myself the “pep-talk”. “You’re okay, you can get through this. Do your exercises, smile, smile, smile, breathe, meditate,....Get some work done, ‘you’ll feel better if you accomplish something’. Eat healthy food, don’t forget to drink lots of water,....” All these things help but it’s still there, lingering in the background, following me around, stalking me, waiting to consume me. I’ve taken medication and gone to therapy and all that “normal” stuff. But long term, adding a Meditation Practice has been the ONLY thing that helps. It re-wires the brain. Yes. It does. And by comparison I am light-years ahead of the depression that I was stuck in 30 years ago. All due to having a meditation practice. At some point during my daily boxing match with depression I came to understand that through mindfulness I did have some choices. I could choose to accept the lie that I wasn’t enough and do nothing, allowing the depression to consume me and swallow me up in its dark vast abyss. Or, I could stick with my practice and find my way out of the darkness. The change came when I intentionally decided to look at the possibility that maybe I am enough. And I realized something. I AM ENOUGH. Just as I am, I am perfect, and I can get even better. But I don’t want to think of myself as an on-going project, or a developing masterpiece. I AM a masterpiece. And like a beautiful painting I may need my frame dusted, or the wall I hang on might need to be painted, or maybe I occasionally need a touch up here and there,... but the truth is I AM A MASTERPIECE. Just as we all are. Even though sometimes our true selves may be hidden under layers of grime that life has deposited on us. Insight meditation has helped me tremendously. Curiously looking at my views and opinions on life. - “Maybe I can see another view from a different angle. Where did the tarnish come from that hides the sparkle of my silver lining? Are the problems of the outside world getting to me? If so, what positive or constructive action can I take to change that?” I am not suggesting you introduce a chatter of thoughts into your meditation, though that often happens all on its own. I am suggesting that when an awareness of an emotion comes up in meditation you may want to open up to it with a curious mind instead of pushing it away. Curiosity and an open heart are the key elements to unraveling an understanding of our deeply rooted emotions. And these deeply rooted emotions can trigger bouts of depression. Adding a Meditation Practice to our daily schedule helps us view our lives with more clarity, exposing the truths and eliminating the illusions and stories we tell ourselves. And I don’t know about you, but I can deal with a truth much easier than I can a lie. *Joanie Lane is the Director and a Teacher at "A Positive Light" Center for Spiritual Awakening. For more information on Joanie and the center visit www.apositivelight.com
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Do we have a responsibility to actualize our potential? If so that would require finding and knowing what that potential is.
There is a myth or perhaps a misunderstanding that Buddhists do not think about the future or dwell in the past. While it’s true that the Buddha taught that worrying or daydreaming about the future is pointless, and regretting or pining over the past is equally pointless, we do take lessons from our past and we still plan for our future It would be difficult, if not impossible, to discover and create a path to our soul’s purpose, and fulfill that calling if we didn’t have some kind of plan. This planning though is not to get lost in and not to consume us. By taking a step back and viewing our life from a distance we can often see more clearly what we might let go of to allow room for our growth. Sometimes this letting go is painful. We may see clearly that in order to move forward we need to leave a job, a relationship or commit to more education. Sometimes it’s pretty scary to step out of our comfortable rut and onto that path to our purpose. And fear can keep us stuck. Unfortunately all too often we stay put because the unknown IS scary. And there we sit idling in a stuck life. We are not deeply happy because we are not moving forward with our purpose. Our soul is crying to move on but because of experiences like our upbringing we may feel we need to fit into a mold in order to be loved, or perhaps we made mistakes in our past that caused pain or sadness, or maybe we are lazy, or we don’t even know how to begin. When we give up on the growth of our spirit we often become sick. We have body aches, we may have clinical depression, we may feel angry throughout our days or carry a feeling of disrespect for ourselves. Living in a small world or keeping our world small may seem more comfortable or secure, but if you are unhappy look inside to see if there is more that your spirit is crying out for. Meditation can help us see how to live in the present moment and still plan for the future. It’s what we do today that creates our tomorrows. Even if you don’t know what you want but you know you feel summoned to do or be more, take a small step to find out what that might be. Perhaps you can read a book on a topic you’ve never read before, or take an art class, or go to the museum or anything that is a little out of the ordinary but still seems intriguing to you. Often a door opens to something you didn’t even know was there. Staying on “the path” is one thing, but if you don’t start moving your feet you will only remain where you are. Oh, and if you are walking a path, look down - if the path is worn it’s not yours. Yours is the path with the footsteps behind you and green grass in front of you. *Joanie Lane is the Director and a Teacher at "A Positive Light" Center for Spiritual Awakening. For more information on Joanie and the center visit www.apositivelight.com |